But what about Christmas?!

But what about Christmas?!
Photo by Cottonbro

Some thoughts on December holidays and Christian hegemony

Since I converted to Judaism last December, I've spent the past year updating friends, acquaintances, and colleagues on my fairly major shift in religious identity. Very few people in my social milieu have ties to Judaism (Minnesota's Jewish community accounts for just over one percent of the state's total population) but everyone has been very kind. Their reactions have actually been remarkably similar: first, some sort of expression of support, a pause, and then a question: But what about Christmas?!

I will still be celebrating Christmas. To me, there is a difference between celebrating a holiday, i.e. taking part in non-religious activities, traditions, and foods, versus observing a holiday, i.e. participating in rituals that involve specific beliefs and values. For example, when I was Catholic, I celebrated Christmas by decorating a tree, exchanging gifts, and baking Christmas cookies, and I observed Christmas by putting up a nativity scene, lighting Advent candles, and attending Mass on Christmas Eve. After I left Catholicism in my mid-20s, I kept celebrating Christmas and I also continued to observe the holiday as a Unitarian Universalist. (Although Unitarian Universalism does not espouse a particular belief system, it's rooted in Christianity, and most UUs are former Christians and/or culturally Christian. Unitarian Universalist communities typically hold Christmas services that invoke the birth of Jesus in some way, including Christmas carols, Biblical readings, and/or a sermon about the nativity story's themes.)

I started drifting away from Unitarian Universalism in 2016, and the last UU Christmas service I attended was via Zoom in 2020. Since then, I have celebrated Christmas but not observed it, and my conversion to Judaism hasn't changed how I feel about the holiday. Everyone in my family—husband, partner, parents, sister, niblings, grandparents, in-laws, etc.—celebrates Christmas, and not taking part in those celebrations feels to me like it would go against the Jewish value of shalom bayit, or maintaining peace and harmony in familial relationships. Celebrating Christmas is also an important part of my cultural heritage. Decorating my home with heirloom ornaments from my late grandmother, baking Christmas cookies with my mom's recipes, and continuing Nordic Christmas traditions connects me to the people who came before me. Commemorating that aspect of the holiday doesn't seem at odds with my Jewish values.

This approach of celebrating Christmas, but not observing it, dates back to the late 1800s in the American Jewish community, and a 2013 Pew survey found that nearly one-third of American Jews put up a Christmas tree in their homes. Likely that's primarily due to the high rate of intermarriage—the Pew survey also found that almost 60% of Jews who had gotten married since 2000 had a non-Jewish spouse. Anecdotally, there are also Jews who simply like the aesthetics of a Christmas tree, including the rabbi who oversaw my conversion, so I feel like I'm in good company.


My personal answer aside, I have come to see the "but what about Christmas" question as being a deeper reflection of Christianity in the United States and its impact on Jews and Judaism. Unless they live in an area with a large Jewish population (such as as New York City, where Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, and Passover are public school holidays) non-Jews' awareness of and engagement with Judaism is likely quite limited. I suspect that the Christmas question came up so frequently because my friends' and colleagues' knowledge of Judaism was basically "Jews don't celebrate Christmas" and maybe a vague sense of Hanukkah as the equivalent Jewish holiday.

This isn't meant as an indictment of anyone. It simply reflects that although the United States doesn't have a state religion, it is a deeply Christian society. For example, the work week is oriented around Sunday, the Christian Sabbath, and Christmas is federal holiday. My husband Mike, who was raised as an atheist without any religious education, nonetheless absorbed a certain amount of information about Christian theology. He also loves celebrating Christmas, to the point where he was actually more enthusiastic about the holiday as a non-Christian than I was as a practicing Catholic. He's the one who plays Christmas carols, decorates our windows and car with Christmas lights, makes sure we watch Elf, and books tickets to the symphony's annual Christmas concert.

The fact that my non-Christian husband is so into Christmas illustrates the black hole-level gravitational pull of the holiday in the United States. Sure, much of it is due to capitalism (the amount of Christmas merchandise that popped up at my local Target on November 1 was truly staggering). But there's also the fact that school calendars are oriented around celebrating Christmas, even if it's called a "holiday break." Most "holiday parties" incorporate Christmas traditions. The "holiday lights" displays that pop up in public spaces, even if they're not overtly Christian, are timed to Christmas and include Christmas symbols like Christmas trees, ornaments, elves, Santa, and so on. I could go on, but you get the point. Christmas is so central to U.S. culture that it's not a surprise that potentially not celebrating it was one of the first things that popped into people's heads when I told them about my conversion to Judaism.

Christmas is such a center of cultural and religious gravity in the U.S. that it has even imparted Hanukkah with outsized cultural importance. From a religious standpoint, Hanukkah is a minor Jewish holiday. If we're doing a one-to-one comparison, I'd say Rosh Hashanah/Yom Kippur are equivalent to the most religiously significant Christian holiday, Easter. I'd map Passover to Christmas, and Hanukkah to...maybe Pentecost? Religiously, it's not a big deal, to the point where there aren't even special synagogue services like there are for holidays like Rosh Hashanah. Traditionally, Hanukkah was a sedate holiday celebrated in the home by lighting candles and eating festive foods. Hanukkah gifts, Hanukkah greeting cards, public menorah displays, and so on started gain traction among Jewish-Americans in the 20th century as a way to maintain a distinctly Jewish identity in the face of ever more prominent Christmas celebrations and the pressure to assimilate.

To be clear, I think it's fine that American Jews make a big deal out of Hanukkah—I'm typing this while wearing a Hanukkah sweatshirt and dreidel earrings—but the Hanukkah hubbub is a fascinating example of how Christian hegemony has affected Jewish cultural and religious practices.


I've been answering the "but what about Christmas?" question solely as a personal one, by reassuring people that yes, I will still be baking Christmas cookies, putting up a Christmas tree, and exchanging Christmas gifts. However, I think the question of Christmas provides an opportunity to delve deeper into what the holiday means to each of us, whether you're observing it as a religious holiday, celebrating it as a cultural tradition, or opting out of it altogether. Maybe we could each use this season to reflect on our values and beliefs, and consider how our religious and culture practices reflect those values and beliefs—or how they don't.

Happy Hanukkah and/or Merry Christmas and/or Happy New Year—may the next few weeks be meaningful, whatever holiday you're celebrating.